Hey little buddy.Annother hunting seasonn is here.Im goinng to deer camp tonnighth when I get off work.I have been tthinking about u alot lateley.For some reason this fall is hurting me evan more.Meibe it is that I know u would of been playing JV football.I miss u so much.I am lookinng for another fight here in Oktober.I want to fightt about once a month Before I get to old to do it.I have 1 in November.I will miss u again this year in the woods with me.

                      LOVE  DADDY

Ran into your Grandpa Dean at the barber shop today.  Brought back memories of the day your dad's friend Chad told me of the tragic accident at work.  Prayers and thoughts to your family Cayden.  Knowing your Grandpa you always were and always will be loved.

God Bless

Rob

Hey buddy

  Alot of your friends have been stopping by lately. I think they remembered that I lived behind the school.  They still miss you.  Brittany and Lauren talked about many things that you use to do.  Lauren remembered when she asked your brother Chase who you were because she had a crush on you both. Also remembered skating with you at the rink.

I'm glad they still think of you. You would have been going to the High School this year and would have been coming down to my house I'm sure.  They were goi ng to the Freshman's football game which I know you would have been on that team. Brittany said she sometimes thinks you will be there.  I told her you were but just looking from above.

They have about 10 friends of yours that are going to walk in the parade in memory of you and to help spread awareness. 

Luv to you always !!!

XXXOOO

Hey buddy we are leaving tonight for the beach after your dad's fight which is in PA. So we will be leaving in the middle of the night, hoping the boys will sleep some on the way down...

The boys are so excited their mouths haven't quit. It's so funny! Keegan wants to try and catch crabs, fish, and sharks. Landen has his heart set on riding go-carts and putt-putting. I can't wait to see Loggy bear on the beach, what he'll think of the sand, and the waves. The first time at the beach is always so special!

I went to the cemetary last night before I picked up Keegan. It had been awhile since I had been there. Your dad and pap had planted the summer flowers this year. Once they had died your grandma planted some more...but my lily's and side bushes are needing to be cut back, I need more multch and need to get new solar lights...As soon as I get back from vacation I'm decorating to fall and giving it a fresh look! 

 There is so much going on this weekend! From packing and all the last minute garbage, your grandmas birthday, Tj's wedding, your dad's fight, vacation, and Peyton is at Akron Children's for breathing problems! She suffers from asthma really bad and the rag weed and pollen counts have been really high...they transported her from our hospital by squad to Akron and admitted her! It's one thing after another!

Watch over your dad tonight. He's trained his butt off for this one and seemed very ready...you just never know the outcome anything can happen in a split second. He really wants me and the boys to go to the next fight...I still don't like taking the boys when he's fighting just like I didn't like you to go when he was fighting...if something would go wrong I don't want any of the boys to see that...we'll see.

You will be in all of our hearts at the beach and always, every step of the way! Loving you forever!

Mei your precious Cayden give hugs of assurance and comfort & wrap his angel wings around you to show you how proud he is of you all. Sending love and hugs to you and to your sweet angel in heaven.

Cayden I can't believe it's another school year already! We are beginning to have Fall weather! It's my favorite time of year...minus the snotty noses we are all supporting! :)

 Keegan is rocking the second grade and Landen is over the moon ( for now) about starting kindergarten Friday! Logan is standing by himself for a couple seconds at a time which is super exciting!

We leave for the beach in two weeks. The boys both are pumped not only that we are going to the beach but that they each get to miss 4 days of school! We are staying at a new resort and with our condo rental we receive a free breakfast every morning...needless to say that put the icing on the cake for Landen! He's telling everyone about the FREE food... so funny!

Well this school year I'm watching two new little girls. Their mommy is Landen's teacher. So I will defiantly be getting the inside scoop so hopefully he behaves! ;)

Your dad fights in PA September 5th the night before we leave for vacation and the night of TJ's wedding.....He's been training like crazy for this fight. It's always so busy around here! I did find out that Ty is going to be staying here, house sitting/dog sitting for us while we are gone, which is a relief...as long as he behaves himslef while we are gone and keeps his company to a minimum :)...no I totally trust Ty and am so grateful he'll be here! Your dad just has been giving him a hard time about the house rules......

 You're missed every second of every day! We ALL carry you in our hearts in all we do! Loving you today and always!!!!!

Have a wonderful night w/ the angels!

           Hey buddy went with your Dad today to C-Tec we talked to some girls that were playing the game that took you from us.  I know it was really tough on your Dad because most of the girls there your Dad & I knew their parents.  They work with us everyday. We didn't know that till we met them. 

        I am so proud of your Dad when he speaks he puts his heart into every word he speaks breaking down like he does hurts me just as much as losing you does.  He has to be one of the strongest people I know.  Hopefully the girls will take the vital information that we gave them and run with it.  The Police Office stated that he thought that it impacted some of the girls and that it will make a difference when it comes to them playing "THE CHOKING GAME"again. The girls knew what had happen to you but just didn't think it would happen to them because they did it in a different way.  Your Dad made it clear that everyway that you play this game you are taking a risk in losing your life or mind.

Getting some emails also of people who want to take a part in spreading awarness with us in the Unitedway Parade.  Dalton has put some information out on My Space and I have put it out on Facebook.

NEVER FORGOTTEN .....  ALWAYS LOVED .....  FOREVER MISSED .....

   I'm sitting here in my living room looking at your picture.
Wondering why you couldn't be a part of my future.
Uncontrollable tears stream down my face while my heart beat starts to race.
Asking God why he took you from my life it was more painful than stabbing me in the heart with a knife.
I still needed you here you were the one to make everything so clear.
You are apart of me and I am apart of you when you died a part of me died too.
I never knew how hard it was to loose someone you love until the day you went to heaven above.
Even though I can't see I know your up there watching over me.
I miss you more and more everyday and all I can do is pray.
In my heart you shall forever remain

XXXOOO

Cayden tomorrow morning we have another presentation to give,  it will be at C Tech. Hopefully we can get through to the girls and inform their parents on what we can only wish we had known!  I have to bring all the kids though( Keegan Landen Payton and Logan). It will be the first time the boys will have seen what we do. I showed them our power point tonight so they would not be blind sided by the information tomorrow. The boys both cried and asked some questions which is never easy...but I'm glad they know what they know.  I might take the boys out of the room at the end where the students have the chance to ask any questions they may have b/c we never know how vivid they might be we've had some 'bold questions' before!    Logan has a doctors appointment tomorrow afternoon b/c he has a runny nose/sore throat and has been tugging at his ears...so if he has a rough night I will have to keep him home and might have to miss which will really disappoint me! Through the school year I miss presentations b/c I babysit teachers kids and they rely on me so I'm always stuck home during the week that's why I really want to come tomorrow!

Carter was diagnosed today w/ Childhood Diabetes. It's very sad and scary. My heart goes out to Carter Angel and John. Try and help them through this difficult new stage of his life... Once they regualte his blood sugar and learn all about his diabetes Carter will be the same active little man he has always been he'll just have to learn to listen and be very aware of his body! He's lucky he has you looking out for him! =) 

Keegan starts school this week and Landen starts next Friday! They both have mixed feelings about going back...pretty normal! We went and played on Landen's new playground tonight. I thought that might make him more excited about going...I thought wrong=)

Good night Cayden. I love you always!

Mom

Cayden went to Texas Roadhouse for dinner tonight.  I couldn't even eat.  All I could do was think of when you were there signing autographs for when you rode a sheep.  I knowyou just loved that place. I was telling the manager that you and your Dad would go in and set up a table.  All the little guys thought you were famous your Dad did some signing  himself.  I still have the picture that you signed for everyone.

I talked yu out of riding sheep and playing soccer.  I thought you would get hurt.  Daddy was so upset with me but he got over it. Daddy even was one of the coaches for your team along with Uncle Randy and myself....Oh how I wish those days were still here.

I'm going to bed now won't be lighting a candle for a couple days will be out of town Your aunts and I are going to Chicago with you on our minds.  We ALL are going to wear your awarness shirt the one from the your Baseball Tournament...it was Aunt Becky's idea.

Love you

XXXOOO

The neighbor boy who is nine went to visit a new friend he had made down the street, he rode his bike. Our neighbors are VERY strange to say the least... Well he never came home. It was well after dark and he was no where to be seen!!! We heard the neighbors outside yelling his name. The police were out looking for him. So your dad and I each drove around trying to find him. We know quite a few of the neighbor kids. So he went one way and I went the other...I went to Zach's three blocks away and he went to Bradleys by the high school. The neighbor boy, had just left Zachs and your dad had him jump in his truck.  We pull back into our driveway the cruisers are out front the neighbors house and the boy jumps out of the car and tries to explain...he is in major trouble! He pretty much lost track of time, finally made some friends, and was just being a boy. Your dad and I aren't fans of the neighbors at all but when it comes to something like that we of course wanted to help!

We are leaving for the beach September 6th! The condo is gorgeous!!! The boys will have to miss 4 days of school just like you always had to which is the only downfall. But we decided we'd rather go on vacation when we can then miss a vacation and regret it later...We've had to learn that our kids will only be little once and to enjoy each day to the fullest...so we are beach bound once again!  Everyone is sooo excited! 

Before Ian stopped by your grandmas Saturday evening we talked w/ his dad for awhile... He had to leave Sunday morning. Your dad swung by and talked w/ him for a little bit after work. He told me how much he has grown...I was just looking at your 11th birthday party pictures w/ all your best friends well except for Alex.  Everyone has changed so much it's crazy. Our minds do wonder what you would look like today...but to me you're not 14 you're forever 12!

The boys send their hugs to Heaven ALWAYS!

I love you!!!

***Memory-of is working fine now. I approve every candle and condolence as I see them...the other night I approved the candles and had to get off b/c Logan started crying... That is the only reason your grandma's condolence was not lit at that time. The site captures what is written.

Hey buddy your best friend came to see me from Flordia today.  So many memories of you and Ian raced through my head.  You both spent many nights with me and had a blast.  Your last Halloween was spent with him.  I remember taking you both out for trick-n-treat.  You were a football player and  Ian was a pimp.  I rode in the car along side of you both cause you wanted to be cool without an adult with you.  glad that I made you feel grown up.

I remember when I took Ian & you to Kentucky Fried chicken and orderd a 12 piece bucket of chicken and I only got one piece and that was a wing how funny was that.  Aunt Bobbie still laughs about that to this day when we talk about you.  She will never forget that she said as long as she lives.

Ian is coming home in December and is going to come over again. I told him I would take him to your Dad's house he wants to see your brothers.  He is really gotten taller and looks so different now.  He even has a little beard. I am sure you would have been alot taller and your looks would have been changed.  Wished you were here so that I could have seen those changes but in my heart you will always be.

Love and MIss you so much until we meet again Have a good nite.

XXXOOO

hey buddy
i've been thinkin alot about you lately
so i figured i'd get on here & write you a lil bit.
I've been talkin to your grandma alot now
because Keegan & my brother are on the same
baseball team & i got a shirt from her to walk
in your parade because i didn't go last year.
But i don't know i cant really think of much to
say right now so i'll write you more later love you buddy.

- Caetlynde.

Hey buddy this marks the 3rd reunion that you could not attend.  Sure was a nice one.  Your brothers had a blast and Tanner was there kinda lonely tho without you to be his partner in many of the games.  He didn't play any of them.

Spoke of you to many family members some are going to walk in the parade this year to help spread the awarness of what took you from us.  My cousin Bev said that there has been 4 kids that have died from this game at the School she works at.  She said that one of the parents were going to contact someone here in Ohio about the game she thought it might have been your Dad.

Your Mom called last night and said that Daddy won his fight I'm sure you were looking down from above.

Loving you always and always on my mind.  Keep close XXXOOO

Well buddy, it's only the beginning of July and it's already been a crazy summer. Logan's surgery on his ears is finally over. They had to drain fluid off his little ears and insert the tubes. He has a flap in both ears, inside the ear canal, that lays the opposite way, it is supposed to. So he never had any drainage from his nose, everything drained right into his ears.  They said it's just his anatomy. We caught it early enough, that he has no permanet hearing loss.....I loved Akron Childrens! I pray we won't have a need to back w/ any of the boys, but if something would ever come up, that's where we're going! They are wonderful. They have a program there called 'Child Life', loved them! No matter what the child's age is, or what they are having done, they get on your child's level and build up a trust, and get them used to the setting, before anything happens. It not only helped Loggy, but it helped me too! The lady got on the floor and let Logan chew on his mask, pull up and down her mask, played peekaboo, even walked him up and down the hallway looking into rooms and then bring him right back to me, building up a trust....awesome program!

Keegan had his last game last night. He loves playing ball. Right now, baseball and soccer are his top favorites! He's loves sports! Landen is still quite content playing guns, swimming, riding his four wheeler and golf cart...nothing that requires running of any kind! They are both such 'boys', just into totally different boy things, but they are best friends and it's so fun watching what they come up with. I can't turn my back for a second. The other day, they built a ramp, and rode bikes down the sidewalk, into the back yard, and ramped (got air) and crashed into the shed...many stitches are in our future!

Logan looks so much like my dad, but his mouth and nose really resembles you!!! I pulled out several baby pictures of you, and my grandparents thought for sure they were of Loggy bear! It's really special!

Your dad fights again, July 18, in Indiana. He's been training for that. He has a couple more fights lined up for this year. So that keeps him pretty busy...

We always have something going on, staying busy,  but you are always in my heart and never more than a thought away! We all miss you so much! The boys always talk about you, and still blow hugs and kisses to Heaven...I love you, forever!

Because you are so loved by me and missed very much each and everyday.

Since Heaven has become your home
I sometimes feel I'm so alone;
and though we now are far apart
you hold a big piece of my heart.

I never knew how much I'd grieve
when it was time for you to leave,
or just how much my heart would ache
from that one fragment you would take.

God lets this tender hole remain
reminding me we'll meet again,
and one day all the pain will cease
when He restores this missing piece

He'll turn to joy my every tear
and when I wear this necklace near
it will become my simple way
to treasure our Reunion Day.

Love you Cayden XXXOOO

Many days goes by that I still can't understand why you had to go. Questions still unanswered. So many nites that when I close my eyes I can see y'r darling face.  Missing every smile you shared, your giggles I can not hear anymore.

Some days are better then others just as it was when you were with me.  Knowing that the next time I will see you will be forever is what keeps me going. 

May your day be a wonderful one, like ones you shared with me.  Noone can take away the closeness we had together, the bond that we shared. I count my blessing's everyday that I got to spend so much time with you thanks to your Daddy.  You were so special to me, more than anyone really knows.  Will keep you in my thoughts throughout the day.

Love

XXXOOO