heyy buddy!

the cayden braclet i had of you broke! i was so upset. i wish i had another one. i wore it everyday. when i wore it i always felt like you was by myside (: everyone asked what it sayed and i would tell them and they would smile at me and tell me i was lucky i new you. that always brightened my day. my dad is having me go hunting next year with him and my grandpa. im pretty exited but scared i might shoot myself or something (: im not very handy with things. My mom and step dad split up awhile ago but istill talk to him because he was in my life for 11 years and i will always take him as a dad, well he has a new baby on the way. im so exited, even though he isnt my real dad by blood, i will take the baby as my new brother or sister. im so happy ! i cant wait . there are 2 girls walking around my schools pregnant. its sickning. they are so young. i didnt believe it till the actually had the teachers comming up to them askin them if they needed anything. and them getting to go home early. its so pathetic that they are even going that far into a relationship like that.they are kids themselves.

basketball is going good. we are undefeated. utica has a pretty good sports thing going on up here. and the people are really nice !

well nuddy im going to go ill talk to you soon! love you bye!

love, caitlyn

Hey little buddy.Keegan is getting ready to wrestle in the tournament u did.Be with him there.It is very cold out side like ur mom said.I want to go deer hunting so bad but it is to cold for me to be out there.I have been training my butt off for a fight but now I am going to wate until April and fight in Columbus.For the light heavy weight title in the NAAFS.I will be fighting A guy from the Ultimate fighter show.His name is Noah Inhoffer.When I win I will have 2 Heavey weight titles and 2 light heavey weight titles.So I have to keep training my butt off and diet I hate dieting.U give me the drive to keep going.I think about u every day little buddy.There will never be a day goes by that i wont think about U.I hope ur mom can put up with me while im training.I love her so much.And so did U.Ur brothers miss u so much.

LOVE DADDY

Hey buddy, I'm missing you very much! Today is the coldest day of the year. It's bitter cold, and it just hurts to be outside even for a moment. We have ice on some of our windows...

Things here always hectic. The boys keep us very busy. There is always something going on, or something needing to be done. The boys are as rotten as ever, what one doesn't think of, the other one does. They don't understand why the past two days I wouldn't let them out to play in the snow. I keep telling them that the cold air could chap their skin, that it's  just too cold to be out. They keep telling me, that snow days are for playing in the snow!=) Tonight, I was feeding Logan and I heard them in the bathroom laughing, I thought they were sorting through their bath toys in the drawer...I was wrong! They were spraying each other with BLEACH. They had a Clorox Clean-Up fight in the bathroom! I freaked out and told them they could go blind if it had got in their eyes. They totally ruined their pants and didn't have a care in the world. I spanked their butts, but I know it didn't hurt too bad because neither one cried... I can't turn my back for a minute with those two! Earlier, I had them both in the hot tub for a big bubble bath. I was right in the laundry folding cloths, peeked into check on them and the dog was in with them! Keeg and Landen are wild little boys, but two of the most loving little guys anyone could ask for! Every single day, one of them mentions you, in some way. They miss you with all their hearts too!

Landen lost his front upper tooth now, which makes three. His other front tooth is hanging  on by a thread. It's really cute! Keegan is loving wrestling but has lost a couple matches and he's a little down about that. We keep telling him that it's ok, he'll win some and lose some...all he can do is try his best. Logan's tooth is still just poking through, not in all the way yet. He coos ALL the time and is chunking up quite nicely! Your dad started training hard again...just incase a fight comes up. I just keep trying to manage the chaos and remember each day is a gift!

I love you Cayden! Enjoy the beauty and warmth of Heaven! And know you are eternally missed and forever loved!

Good night,

Mom

Hey buddy wanted to let you know that Grandpa Wince got his Tattoo of your picture on his right arm.  This makes 3 tattoo's of you.  Uncle Randy has one on his left arm, Daddy has one on his forearm and now grandpa has one on his left arm.  You meant the world to them, they miss you so much. I'm next....but I'm not going to get a picture of you.  It will be two Angels, because that is what I have in Heaven  You and Cameron my special little Angels.

I have been thinking of you all day long...missing you is one of the hardest things that I have to deal with each and everyday.  Other things I can get over.  Missing you I can not.  Life is not the same and never will be as everyone knows when they lose someone special.  You were more than special to me you were like a son....even though you were my grandson.  God's plan made it possible for you and I to share so many things together before he called you home and I thank him many times for giving that to me.

You are forever in my heart and on my mind.

Love XXXXOOO  

Grandma

Cayden, winter is defiantly here! The snow is coming down and we could have up to 5 inches by tomorrow evening! Logan is still too little, but the boys want to be outside all the time. They cancelled Landen's school twice this week because of the back roads...which made him a pretty happy camper! Poor Keegan had to go all week.

The anniversary of the accident is very close. You've been our angel in Heaven now for almost 2 years. It's still very hard to handle everything...The boys still talk about you all the time. Last night when Landen was saying his prayer, he staryed talking to you. I know you could hear him...

I'm getting ready to have Logan dedicated, I'm very excited about that. I haven't scheduled a day yet, but I'm working on it. Landen is also going to be dedicated, together on the same day. It means a lot to me to have that done.

Well buddy, I have to go for now. Have a wonderful day up above.

I love you and miss you so much!!!

Hello Cayden,

               You have been in my thoughts lately but especially this evening.  I went to calling hours for a young NC student named Devin Reid.  He was 20 and had been battling cancer .  He put up quite a fight- he was give 6 months to live but carried on for 3 years and 4 months.  He made it through New Years and took a turn for the worse.  It was such an experience walking into the high school looking at all his pictures and memorbilia.  It has devestated our school and community.  So many young students were  there saying goodbyes to their friend. I thought of you the whole time. It was heart wrenching to watch. It reminded me of your calling hours and the difficulty of offering condolences to grieving parents and watching all those young faces struggling to understand everything. As  I did then- again I felt so helpless tonight.  A parent shoud never have to bury their own child.  It was again heartbreaking.  Both of you touched sooo many lives in your short time here.  God truly had a special plan for the two of you.  So many people looked up to you guys and still do and foever will.  Devin was a runner and to honor him we all walked under the lights with him as a NC family as a marching band played "when the saints go marching in" around the track for one last lap as he has finished his last race. I am sure he has arrived in heaven in style because that would be his nature.  Please watch over him.  I truly believe the two of you are special angels looking down on those who loved you.  I will never forget how much you touched everyone and made such a difference in their and my own life. I cherish the time I had with you.  I think about you every single day and remember your mischevious grin.  You were such a happy boy that I watched as the year went on mature into a young man. I continue to pray for you and keep you close in my heart.  I do believe that each person we meet and spend time with IS for a reason.  You truly changed my life and made me appreciate every day.  Thank you for the wondeful memories I will carry with me forever.  There is a new angel in heaven tonight- welcome him home Cayden. You will continue to be in my thoughts as your birthday approaches.  Send strength and love to those who love and miss you especially your dad and grandma.  Help them be able to celebrate your life and remember  the wondeful, happy times they were blessed to have with you.

                              Mrs. Allyn ( Stacey Allyn)

Hey buddy, missing you very much tonight! You have been very heavy on my mind and heart lately...

Landen is spending the night with his first friend tonight! My little man is growing up. He went home with Hunter after school and other than him stopping by this evening to get his clothes, I won't see him until tomorrow! This is a first and it's ripping my heart out!   Mom and I were talking tonight about how much Landen is looking like you...the looks he gives and when he's smiling, really resembles you!

Logan will be 3 months old tomorrow! That doesn't seem right either. Life is so short and so precious!

I'm taking the boys to get their pictures done again...Logan's 3 month and then the group photo. I remember when we took you guys for Landen's 3 month and then the group photo. The candid shot ended up being my favorite. After some time of trying to get all three of you smiling and looking at the camera at the same time, you were rubbing Landen's head while he was laying on the blanket and Keeg kissed his foot...it was beautiful! It's still up in the frame!

Good night babe!  

Cayden I haven't forgot you I just don't have a computer to get on always.  Mine crashed will be getting it fixed hopefully before long.  Until then know that you are on mind even if I don't leave a message and know that I think of you as if you were still here.  The memories you had left me will always be kept so close to my heart.

The times we spent together I cherish everyday, I was so blessed to have so many days and nights with you.  God knew what he was doing and I guess he wanted me to have all those memories to hold onto.

May you have the Joyous New Year in Heaven and bless all that comes up there, knowing someday it will be me.  Missing you so much everyday and night.  If I could have just one wish to come true YOU know what that would be.   Nothing says that I can't wish.

Love you till we meet again.  Always with you.  XXXOOO

Well buddy, 2008 is officially over. We are into a new year and God only knows what we all have instore for us...

Keegan is doing so well in school. He only complains about the school day being so long. He told me he goes for 15 hours a day, which it probably seems like that at times.  He started wrestling and his little singlet says 'Newark Catholic' and he looks adorable and so grown up! He still only weighs 50lbs but is pretty strong. He will be wrestling at RV for an open invitational this month...same place you wrestled....He is as rotten as ever but we couldn't have it any other way!

Landen likes school but only for the social aspect of it all! His attention span is much like mine and when he loses interest it's over. We never know what he's going to say or what's about to come out of his mouth. He's so loving but a total free, laid back spirit. He is slimming down some, weighing 67. Keeg and Landen couldn't be built more differently. It's neat though because they are best friends. Last night they were playing with all their new toys in the toy room and right before bed, wanted to color. They worked together, and all on their own drew a family picture. They drew you, to the best of their ability, in such great detail. You had a Michigan hat on, freckles on your nose and cheeks, and great big smile. Your picture took up almost the whole page and the rest of us were tiny..The boys were so precious.

Logan is just shy of 17 lbs and has some juicy little thighs on him. He is teething already, and not even three months old!!! When he talks,  or coos, it's the cutiest thing. He concentrates and just works so hard to get all the noses out. He LOVES to look in the mirror and be in his new little Rain Forest Jumperoo. I can't wait until he sleeps all night or even like 5 hours at a time but I know not to rush anything...these days go by too fast as it is.

Cayden, we love and miss you so much! You are still and always will be apart of our everyday lives. January 31st will be here before we know it and it's mind boggling how much our lives have changed in the past two years. Unimaginable...I don't think I'll ever understand why children have to die.

Good night sweet boy!

Cayden

  May you shine down upon everyone as they bring in yet another New Year without you.  The last two years have been very trying at times.  Wondering how everyone get's through the tough times.  Thanks for the strength that I am sure that you have been giving me.  You are still a blessing to me and the time that I had with you.  Know that you will never beforgotton no matter how many years go by.

Loving you with everything that I have and missing you the same.  Have a good time up in heaven.  Let Grandma Mellars know that I will be thinking of her tonight wishing she was with us for the New Years Party that she was all so much a part of.

XXXXOOO

As I laid out the kids piles under the tree, I kept thinking about you  and how this is our second Christmas without you. It's still very hard in so, so many ways. Still so hard to believe...

I will hold onto every Christmas we had with you and every memory as long as I live. Even though my heart feels we didn't have enough of them, I know every one of them was such a special blessing! 

I know we will feel your presence with us throughout the day. Have a wonderful and glorious Christmas in Heaven buddy, celebrating the birth of Christ...

I love you! Merry Christmas!  

 Cayden

 Christmas last nite was nice, many memories crossed my mind, not seeing you opening the gifts was a hard one. Not hearing your laughter and giggles.  This was the 2nd year without you and still is very hard without you. Your brothers had a good time.  Landen kept saying more while Keegan just sat on the couch waiting patiently for the next one. Logan just cooed 

 I believe Tanner was a little lost.  All your ornaments that you had made me was on the tree...I would see Tanner staring at them.I'm sure he was thinking of past Christmas.  Daddy did pretty good broke down once.  He is working today on Xmas eve and off tommorrow xmas day  I will probally sleep till time to go to Grandpa Mellars..

  May your  Xmas in Heaven with a wonderful one again.  Look down upon all that loved you and remember even though you are so far away....you will always be so close to my heart.  I left a present for you at your resting place...inside are all my hugs and kisses.  Also I still have your voice on my message machine from the last Xmas where you called and wished me a Merry Xmas....I will play it the 1st thing in the morning, there was a reason that I saved it and now I know why... since you can  not be hear to tell me I can listen to it on the phone.

Love you with all that I have

Merry Christmas

XXXOOO

Hello to you all:

      Just wanted to stop by and thank you for  visiting our Stephen's site, if  I can thru the tear's. I am so very sorry for your terrible loss. Your little boy Caydon 's story touched me so much. We all that have a site are sad at this time of year. I know that when it's kid's it's so very hard. They wander and do things that are all part of growing up. Sometimes we wonder how we ever survived the things we did growing up. Your little Caydon didn't and it is so heart breaking.Sometimes we think we have warned them of all the dangers but there are still some that we don't know.My daughter has lost both her boy's(. Stephen and little Christopher). As a granny I know it's hard but as a parent I can only amagine. My daughter can't even visit the site any more. She can't cry all nite after and take care of her two other children, a job and husband.But I will say that time made's it a little easier for all of us. Tho I know you all have heard this and thought - Oh what a terrible thing to say,and if you only knew the pain you wouldn't say that, it is true. It's true because we learn to live with the pain a little better.My heart goes out to you all-Mom,Dad,Granny, and just the whole family. God bless you all and give you strength and some comfort this holiday season. Thanks once again for visiting Stephen's site and giving Birthday wish's. That helps us a little.Words do make us feel a little better. Hope my words comfort you all a little. God Bless.

                                           Granny to Angel Stephen&Chris         

Cayden

  My computer is down so I came over to Grandpa Mellars to use his.  Don't know when I will get it up and running.  Thoughts of you are always with me rather I get on your site or not, but I wanted you to know that with the Holidays coming you will still be a big part of each day.

Merry Christmas to you so far away, hope you have a wonderful time looking down upon all of your friends and family knowing that you will be a part of all the celebration.

A box has been left at your resting place for you.  It has lots of love and kisses in it. May your sing with all the Angels on this Christmas Day and know that the family will be thinking  of you and Grandma Mellars.

Loving you was easy, losing you is what has been so hard.

Merry Christmas to you. I will be listening to you telling me Merry Christmas I am so glad I saved that message.

XXXOOO

Twas not long before Christmas
and I dreaded the days,
That I knew I was facing – 
the holiday craze.
The stores were all filled 
with holiday lights,
In hopes of drawing customers
by day and by night.
As others were making their holiday plans,
My heart was breaking - I couldn’t understand.
I had lost my dear child a few years before,
And I knew what my holiday had in store.
When out of nowhere, there arose such a sound,
I sprang to my feet and was looking around,
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash
The sight that I saw took my breath away,
And my tears turned to smiles in the light of the day.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a cluster of butterflies fluttering near.
With beauty and grace they performed a dance,
I knew in a moment this wasn’t by chance.
The hope that they gave me was a sign from above,
That my child was still near me and that I was loved.
The message they brought was my holiday gift,
And I cried when I saw them in spite of myself.
As I knelt closer to get a better view,
One allowed me to pet it - as if it knew -
That I needed the touch of its fragile wings,
To help me get through the holiday scene.
In the days that followed I carried the thought,
Of the message the butterflies left in my heart -
That no matter what happens or what days lie ahead,
Our children are with us - they’re not really dead.
Yes, the message of the butterflies still rings in my ears,
A message of hope - a message so dear.
And I imagined they sang as they flew out of sight,
“To all bereaved parents and Grandparents- We love you tonight!”
By Faye McCord